Laura at Heavenly Homemakers is hosting an event this Saturday, where everyone will share their love story. I thought it would be fun to participate and tell the story of how my husband and I met and started dating.
My husband and I met in college in the fall of 2004. At this time, I had been in a relationship for a few years, but it wasn't going so well. Riv and I first saw each other in dramatic lit class, and though it took us a while to actually get together, it was truly a "love at first sight" moment for both of us. On the first day of class our professor was taking attendance and everyone had to tell their major. Most everyone in the class was either an English major or a language arts major, but then the teacher got to my husband's name and he pronounced that he was an English and history major. I immediately turned around to look at him because I was a double major in history and English as well. When I looked back, he was looking at me too. (I had already called out my major, so he also knew at that moment that we were doing the same course of study.) It was just a look at that point, but I'll never forget it.
The next part is funny. Most people who read my blog probably don't know this, but I am very shy. In fact, most people, unless they actually get to know me well, would swear that I'm the quietest person they've ever met. In some quarters I've even been nicknamed "the quiet girl."
So a couple of days later, I'm sitting quietly in dramatic lit, just trying to blend in as usual, when Riv comes up to me before class and asks me what I could tell him about our program of study. First of all, I'm taken totally by surprise that he's talking to me at all, and second, I've only just transferred to the school the semester before, and I really have no information to tell him! So panicking on the inside, I told him that I didn't really know anything, and then I told him to "talk to his advisor." (Could I be a bigger nerd? Is it possible?) Months later I would ask him about that day, and he would admit that it was all just an excuse to talk to me and possibly ask me out. And to this day, my husband still jokes about the first time when he tried to talk to me, and I blew him off!
Over the next few months, Riv and I had a couple of classes together each semester. Finding him attractive, I'd often look his way, but I never really said much to him, unless he spoke to me first. I just sort of watched and listened. In class he was very thoughtful and always had something interesting to say or ask the teacher, and when I'd see him talk to his friends, I could tell he was a fun-loving guy. But the thing that really got me to admire him happened one day in the dramatic lit class. We were discussing A Raisin in the Sun
, and a student was making an observation about the play, and I sort of agreed with his observation, as cynical as it was. But then Riv spoke up and explained to the student that he was missing the entire point of the play, and that point was that you can't buy self-respect. He spoke with such strength and authority that I couldn't help but admire him, and his insight also showed me that he was a person of integrity.
The following spring, he made a few more attempts to talk to me during class, but being both shy and a bit paranoid that this was just some joke and ploy to "get the quiet girl to talk," I only gave him answers that were short and to the point. (Example: How are you? Good. Are you ready for this test? I think so.) You have to understand that I was very shy and self-conscious, but also he had this way of joking with me and teasing me, such that I never knew if he was flirting with me or making fun of me. I hoped that he was flirting because I really liked him.
And I thought about talking to him before or after class, but there was always other people around him, which kept me away. Finally the following summer I decided it was time. (Occasionally I do have moments of courage.) Some things in my life had changed dramatically, and I decided that I had nothing to lose. So one day after class, I walked outside and waited for him. When he walked out, he seemed very surprised to see me. All he could say was, "What's up?"
When I told him that I wanted to talk to him, he looked stunned. We walked over to a bench and sat down. I can't remember how the conversation went exactly, but I basically explained to him that I felt bad because he had tried to talk to me so many times, and I had very little or nothing to say, and I didn't want him to think I didn't like him. He said he figured that I was just shy, and then he told me that he had wanted to ask me out for a while but he wasn't sure what my situation was or whether I'd be interested. He also told me that he had even asked around to see if anyone else knew how to get in touch with me. (It was so good to know that I wasn't the only one who had these feelings, especially considering how very little we actually knew each other.)
That evening we exchanged phone numbers and made plans to go out. I wanted to be "realistic" and keep my expectations low because I had been burned before, and yet I couldn't help but feel hopeful and think of the possibilities. And sure enough, within the first few weeks of dating, he exceeded even my greatest expectations. Everything just seemed to come together perfectly. Just when it seemed like I might be entering a period of doom and gloom, he saved me. He showed me what it was like to have someone who truly cared for me. There was a strong connection between us immediately and we fell in love. Since then we've been inseparable.
After dating for about a year, we graduated from college, and four months later we got married in December of 2006. Since I've known my husband, he's brought so much joy and happiness into my life. He's been my best friend, and every day I thank God for bringing him into my life!
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